Thursday, July 9, 2009

Communication Priorities

Nowadays there are so many ways to communicate it's almost impossible to know which method to use. To the unknowing outsider, they all seem similar, but under further scrutiny, the intricacies of present day communication become apparent. Phone calls, text messages, BBMs, e-mails, IM's, GChats, Facebook messages, wall posts, pokes and friend requests are all very unique ways of communicating, and it's very hard to know which one to use and when.

Let's go back a few decades and realize that our parents' generation had it GOOOOOOD! If someone said, "hey, here's my number," that was the only way to communicate. You either called, or you didn't. Each action had a very clear meaning; no call meant "not interested" and if you called it was clear that you were interested. But now we have to chose our form of passive apathy to prove that we're interested. How weird is that? How bass ackwards?

I've taken it upon myself to define the meaning of each form of communication, and how the method of communication is just as important, if not more than the content itself.

The phone call. The oldest and easiest way to convey what you're truly feeling has become risque. If you just met someone and decided to call them without establishing a text conversation beforehand you are BOLD! You're so bold that the person receiving the call might not answer, just because they have to interpret and digest the meaning the phone call.

The text message. It seems that text messaging is easiest way to open a line of communication without looking too interested. WARNING! the amount of time you wait before responding to text messages is vital to their interpretation. If you respond too quickly, then you're too interested! If you respond too late, you're totally disinterested. Find the happy medium. Also, make sure not to insinuate too much. Texts lack inflection, so you risk being misinterpreted.

BBM. BBM stands for Blackberry Messenger, the proprietary text messaging service available to Blackberry users. This technology adds a whole new dimension to text messaging because it discloses whether the recipient has read your BBM or not. That's a huge issue!! If you BBM someone and you see that they read your BBM and didn't respond, consider that a slap in the face or a swift kick in the nuts. There are many meanings to the unanswered BBM; none of them good.

E-mail. E-mail has taken on a more formal appearance given the advent of texting. If you e-mail someone, you are establishing a more mature and professional relationship. It shows that you've thought about what you wrote, and that you aren't playing text games. This is great way to work yourself into a "friends" stream of communication, because e-mail connotes maturity. E-mail also allows for lengthy explanations and more in depth conversations. It seems to be the form of flirtation chosen in a more professional environment. There's a lot of reading between the margins. ;)

IM's. AIM is a very, very sticky situation. Now that many people are logged on AIM throughout their workday, it's easy to exhaust your amount of IM time. IM's don't necessarily have that much meaning, but if you're chatting with someone you're interested in, the time between each IM is the most telling. You know the person you're IMing is sitting right in front of their computer, but they're choosing when to respond to you. The silence can mean a few things. #1 they're so swamped with work that they can only respond intermittently, #2 they are talking to many other people and you must await your response, or #3 they want to make you sweat. Either way, it can be very rewarding and can be very discouraging.

GChat. GChat is the proprietary instant messaging service provided by Google. It's very similar in nature to AIM, but it forgives slow reaction time. It's simply the newer form of instant messaging and people tend to think it's trendier. Nothing that special. In fact, the interface is weak as hell. The newness of it is the only thing attracts people.

Facebook messages. Facebook messages are a very casual way of communicating. It's sort of a social e-mailing system. If someone Facebook messages you, it's a subtle and chill way of expressing interest. It shows that you are patient and are in no need of an instant reaction. Facebook messages are a good route to prove you true apathy!
[remember that apathy is cool!]

Facebook wall posts. Wall posts are some of the most ballsy forms of communication. If you post a message like "great seeing you this weekend, had a great time" you're attempting to mark your territory with words opposed to urine. The wall post is masked as a direct message to the recipient, but since all 750 of their friends are privy to the wall, it becomes a form of bragging and making everyone aware that you spent time together, and on top of that, had a "great time!" Wall posts can really affect the way people act. No joke!

Facebook pokes. Pokes have somewhat gone by the wayside for Facebook Gen-1, but in case you did poke someone, it's brazen way of saying "hey, I like you."

The friend request. At Facebook's inception, everyone was friending everyone. People were friending people in their college they didn't even know. However, once the unwritten Facebook handbook was published, errant friending became taboo. So now it's important for people to pick and chose who and when they friend. If you friend someone that you just met, you seem very eager. If you wait a few days, you've shown you have self control, but still reaffirm your interest.

It's very very hard to communicate these days because there are so many layers and meanings. In many cases, technology has been a force for good, curing diseases, spreading information, and connecting people across the universe. In other cases, its stood in the way of basic human interaction, and that's a shame.